Cockney Rhyming Slang for Parts of the Body

The human body generates a lot of slang. Maybe it’s because bits of it are always playing us up. Anyway, here’s a quick run-down from top to bottom. See if you can work out what all these slang mean:

On yer loaf of bread you’ve got your Barnet Fair (or maybe a syrup of figs). On yer boat race you have yer mince pies, King Lears and I suppose.

In yer north and south you’ve got yer Hampstead Heath. Yer loaf sits on yer Gregory Peck, which sits on yer Noddy Holders.

If you’re a woman you might have Bristol cities (or thrupenny bits) on yer Bristol and West.

We’ve all got a pair of Chalk Farms poking out with a pair of German bands at the end. In yer Derby Kelly lives yer Newington Butts.

Don’t eat too much in case yer fish and chips start expanding.

In the Screaming Lord Sutch area, the menfolk have a Hampton Wick, which is what he uses to have a Jimmy Riddle or a gypsy’s kiss, under which his orchestra stalls (or cobblers’ awls or Niagara Falls or Albert Halls) live.

The ladies are blessed with a Morris Minor (or a struggle and grunt) instead.

Male or female, we’ve all got a bottle and glass (also known as an Aris) at the back with which we can have a tom tit.

Yer plates of meat are at the end of yer Scotch eggs, and yer Bromley by Bows at the end yer Scotches.

And that just about sums up the cockney parts of the body!

Here’s our list of terms from the dictionary that are body-related. If you’ve got any more, sling ’em over!