Big Ben's Last Bong
Big Ben is a dirty great TICK TOCK that lives near Westminster Bridge.
Well, turns out that Big Ben is in a bit of a TWO AND EIGHT, so for the next four years a load of CAPTAIN KIRK, totaling 29m, will be carried out on the Elizabeth Tower to renovate the building and the bell itself.
No more bonging? What a crying shame.
But there's no need to get your knickers in a twist, we'll still be able to hear the 13-tonne bell sound out for on New Year's Eve and Remembrance Sunday and the like.
Personally I suggest you get a nice new KETTLE AND HOB and be done with it.